After my Freshman year of college was over, I booked it down to Key West (where my parents had been living for a year) and got a job working in the K-Mart Electronics Department.

This job was awesome. I got paid $10 an hour to hang out in the back corner of the store putting CDs in order and facing the merchandise. This is great for someone who enjoys organizing other people’s shit.

I also learned a bit of espanol. Like when the Cuban kids would ask when the newest Pokemon Game Boy would be in-stock, I would say, “Manana.” If there’s one thing I remember about that summer it was those damn Pokemon games! Holy shit. There were four versions that were released periodically that summer.

Of course, here’s the problem with Key West and K-Mart’s advertising plan. All the shit that’s advertised in the weekend papers was most likely not in our store. We were the last stop on the truck, so.. after Miami-Dade, Key Largo and Marathon.. there was nothing else for us and people would be pissed (like I’m the one who decided not to ship it).

My biggest pet peeve would be when people would try to check out in the electronics department, when they didn’t purchase a single item from electronics. In fact, one day.. I had rung an item up for Y and the woman stated it was in fact X. I went over to sporting goods, looked at the sign and it was Y. She started throwing a tantrum and I said, “Ma’am, maybe if you had checked out in sporting goods, we wouldn’t be having this problem.” And damn, she went off.

But the problem with sporting goods is that the dude who worked over there never manned his register, which posed a problem for me because I did not know how to a) make keys; or, b) sell a fishing license (which is a big scam). So I was paging that guy. A lot.

My second biggest pet peeve was when people would go over to the stereos and turn the volume up on several of them. Seriously? Although sometimes I would turn the volume up on one and jam out, then blame it on a customer if anyone ever asked.

Overall, everyone was friendly and great fun. We did have a bit of drama that summer when one of the managers left her husband to move in with one of females that worked in stocking. But it was Key West and no one was entirely shocked.

[Courtesy of Rusty's Jobs I've Had series.]

My first real job was with Ponderosa Steakhouse in South Georgia. I worked there for nearly a year, starting at the end of my junior year and continued until I graduated.

First let me tell you, it is not a real steakhouse. Sure, you can order a ribeye or the oddly named chicken fried steak, but.. most people came for the buffet.

I’m not quite sure how I happened upon this job. My friend R. worked the grill, told me they were hiring, drove me there after school one day.. and bam, I walked into my house later announcing that I had secured a job. They were quite amazed.

I started out working the cold bar (re-filling the salad bar – ugh), moved up to hot bar (where I learned how to make green bean casserole) and finally up to waitressing.

The uniform involved khakis (shorts, skirts or pants), a short green waist apron, a purple button down and tie that had tacos and burgers on it. For Real.

The nice thing about waitressing at Ponderosa was that a lot of roughneck Southerners and Navy guys frequented there, so it was easy to get nice tips if you wore short shorts and cocked your head.

But alas, my favorite tip story was when a couple had requested more butter for their rolls. After they left, their receipt had, “Where’s our butter?” written on it, with a quarter sitting on it. Damn.

And there was quite a cast characters who worked there, from The Manager – who referred to CNN as the Clinton News Network and slept with one of the 16 year old waitresses – to The MILF Waitress – who once told a group of patrons that she stayed in shape through sexercise – to the Pregnant Waitress – who smoked like a chimmey and was very vocal about telling people it was her right to smoke.

One night, I had had enough and stormed out of the restaurant and attempted to tear out of the parking lot.. and backed right into a friend from high school. We did not call the police however because he had been drinking. He paid for my car and I went back to work.

Another night, one of the cooks gave me a ride home and attempted to impress me with his awesome “bat out of hell” driving on a dirt road. Bad idea. The car spun out of control and I flew out of the windshield (no, I was not wearing my seat belt). I escaped uninjured, but I do have a few scars to remind me to buckle up. Every. Time.

One thing is for sure – it was never dull.

The sun sets on the first-century ruins of Nemrud Dagh, Turkey, millennia after it set on the ancient kingdom itself. Built by King Antiochus I in southeastern Turkey, the kingdom is one of the best preserved but least known ruins of the Late Hellenistic period. Its monuments are a story in stone depicting the king, his family and ancestors, and their interaction with the gods.

(Photo shot on assignment for, but not published in, “Wrath of the Gods: Centuries of Upheaval Along the Anatolian Fault,” July 2000, National Geographic magazine)

1. Figure out Georgia’s stupid name change law.
2. Write Bobby Flay re: Mesa Grill
3. Write Steve Wynn re: The Wynn
4. Write Thank You cards!
5. Go through wedding photos and pick out sixteen.
6. Laundry, laundry, laundry.
7. Dry cleaners.
8. Grocery shopping
9. Go through Bloglines. Ugh.

From a random comment:

Why do yuppies like to line up for food?

Like seriously, is Pasta Mia in Adams Morgan that good? Or is it just some trendy boho fad.

Like, 2 Amy’s is good pizza. But, I think, the reason most of my friends rave about it is because it’s always packed and trendy. Whereas Vace pizza, down the road, is half the price, and just as good, if not better.

So, please speak about Pasta Mia and the hoax that is being pulled on DC transplant 20-30ish year old (mostly) white urban bourgeois

I wonder this same thing about Figo and Taqueria del Sol on Howell Mill.

Story #1

Well before Christmas, I ordered T. a DS game on BestBuy.com. I used an old gift card, which paid for everything but $3, and chose in-store pick-up (this was probably a bad idea because the whole point of ordering online is so that you don’t have to go to Best Buy during the shopping season).

As fate is wont to do, T. then mentioned a different DS game when we were at Target. Fine. When I was notified that my DS game had arrived in-store, I showed up, picked up the other game off the shelf and headed to Customer Service, thinking it would be an easy exchange since they were the same price. Ha! What I encountered was a scam!

She returned the first DS game and put the money back on the gift card. She then informed me that it could take up to 24 hours for the money to show back up on the card, sooo.. I had two options: 1) Wait until tomorrow to buy the game (no they couldn’t hold it for me); or, 2) Buy the game and then show up the next day to get a refund from my gift card. But, I’m pretty sure Best Buy was banking an secret 3) Buy the game and either don’t come back for my refund OR show up tomorrow and buy something else with the gift card.

I chose the second option, which was a pain in the ass.

Story #2

Mom gifted us Mario Kart for Christmas, not knowing that we had already bought it and ripped through the levels. She gives us the receipt and mentions she bought it over 90 days ago, whic means the receipt is “expired.” Whatever, we were fine with store credit.

Except the girl at Target says no, no refund or exchange. What? The receipt is expired!! Well, what if we didn’t have the receipt? She says she can’t do anything because it’s over $35. Her advice? Return it to Wal-Mart.

So, we do. But I think Wal-Mart got a great deal. They gave us store credit and we bought a vacuum cleaner. Likelihood that Wal-Mart was going to sell a vacuum cleaner? LOW. Likelihood that Wal-Mart will sell that Mario Kart within days? HIGH.

It was a win-win for everyone.

This is the best thing I’ve seen on the internet in weeks.

Whenever I get a package of plain M&Ms, I make it my duty to continue the strength and robustness of the candy as a species. To this end, I hold M&M duels.

The picture is the best part!